Eileen Kennedy-Moore, PhD, is a clinical psychologist, author, and speaker, based in Princeton, NJ recently posted an excellent piece in Psychology Today about how kids learn resilience by overcoming ordinary suffering:
“It’s natural for us parents to want to protect our children from pain and suffering, but if we rush to rescue children from problems that they could solve on their own, we prevent them from learning how to cope. Well-intentioned comments like, “Here, let me do it,” “I’ll talk to the teacher for you,” or “I’ll take care of it,” tell children, “You can’t handle this.”
Sometimes the best thing we can do for our kids is to allow them to struggle. This helps our children develop important life skills, and it also shows our faith in their ability to grow and learn.
Here are five character-building struggles that our kids can and should handle on their own. We can help by asking relevant questions or expressing support and understanding, but the solutions for these problems need to come from children themselves.”
The full article can be read here.